Hollywood Dictionary: Volume 25

And now, more from the Hollywood Dictionary.  If there are terms you want defined, please send them to TempX@Tempdiaries.com.

Pilot presentation: In an economy like this, it's hard to find studios that are willing to spend tons of cash on things that don't involve executive bonuses.  And when they do, it's typically for needless junkets to SXSW, NATPE and other acronymed events that could just as easily take place at the NORMS (not an acronym, just a name in capital letters) on La Cienega.  So this means little money is left over for important things like financing pilots, you know, the core business.  This results in pilot presentations, which are essentially Cliffs Noted version of real pilots. They're about as long as an extended commercial break and typically stand no chance.

Upfronts: Strangely this is not the opposite of "Back End," although it would be great if it was.  On the subject of junkets, this is the one that everyone wants to go on.  It's the annual gathering of network/studio types as they attempt to get ad agency execs drunk enough to buy time on shows like The CW's musical chairs program "Oh Sit!"  For studios looking to save a little dough, instead of putting up 20 people at the Mandarin Oriental Hotel (Central Park room view - $1,059/night), why not just FedEx Young & Rubicam DVDs of all your shows and set up a conference call?  Even with a dime bag of coke, you'll still come out way ahead on the ledger.