BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!

EXCLUSIVE! OPRAH ANNOUNCES RETIREMENT!! NEW MOON MAKES A WHOLE BUNCH OF MONEY!!! NIKKI FINKE USES TOO MANY EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!! I'M STILL UNEMPLOYED!!!!! IN CONCLUSION, I DON'T CARE ABOUT OPRAH, KRISTEN STEWART OR ROBERT PATTINSON!!!!!! But Ashley Greene is very cute. Yo girl, call me. :)